I'm an F-18 and I Will Destroy You In the Air*

For the sake of fashion, I gave myself the world's biggest blister today.

It's smack dab on the great toe joint of my left foot, a perfect hemisphere of tender skin and pressurized fluid. I keep glancing at the thing, expecting it to explode any moment. The culprit, of course, is a brand-new pair of shoes.

I got these Raeburn suede pumps by Rag & Bone at Shopbop for 70% off plus a $25 off coupon. At such a steal, I can forgive these shoes some pain. They're not even particularly uncomfortable: I simply should not power-walk five blocks to work in brand-new heels. Halfway there this morning, I found myself wishing I'd brought along some flats. I hobbled into work and cadged a band-aid from the secretaries, then spent the day bravely strutting the halls.

I tried not to grimace whenever I received a compliment. They do look good.

One reviewer on Shopbop called them the "stealth bomber" of pumps, and she has a point. That curved heel is show-stopping.

I would call this shoe a F-18, though. Sexy and streamlined, but also chunky and obnoxious. You cannot ignore these on someone's feet.

These are only my trying-on photos. This is what I wore today:

Top: Anthropologie. Pants: Alexander Wang.

Aren't these pants insane? Holy MC Hammer daddy parachute silk, Batman!

I wanna bust a move in these. But not with this blister.

fin


*With apologies to Charlie Sheen. Winning.